Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I just gargled with NyQuil
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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