He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
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Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
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The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I lost the right to judge tonight
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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