am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
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Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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