4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
This house was built for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize