ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
The Olympian is in my bed
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
