I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
