I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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