I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
My vagina is very pro this idea
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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