to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize