Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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