she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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