ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize