Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
