end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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