It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
