I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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