that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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