God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
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Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
send nudes
from the living room?
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