the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize