i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize