that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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