She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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