Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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