So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
