yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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