It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
