I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
