I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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