I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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