Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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