I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
