Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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