i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize