1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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