wanna go halves on a baby?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
