I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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