My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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