oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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