i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
