listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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