My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize
