in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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