I just saw a hot homeless man
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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