Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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