So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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