Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You are the jesus of drinking
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
