i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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