You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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