Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
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