umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
